29th October 2021

Is An Adults Only Wedding Right For You?

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Deciding on the guestlist for your wedding is one of the hardest aspects of wedding planning. You have to take into account your budget, your family and friend obligations, and also the kind of wedding you would like to have. If you are the type of person who envisions a lot of drinking, a sophisticated meal, or a super late night of celebrations, then an adults only wedding may be right for you. Here is a breakdown of what this means and the pros and cons of choosing to omit children from your wedding day.


What is an Adults Only Wedding?

An adults only wedding means that no children are invited to either the ceremony or the evening party. This could be for a few reasons. Either you are a budget conscious couple looking to keep numbers down, or you have a sophisticated event in mind which isn’t appropriate for younger guests. Either of these reasons is fine by us; this is your wedding day, it is 100% your choice who attends.


Can I invite Some Children to my Adults Only Wedding?

This is a touch one! To avoid offending anyone, it may be best to stick to no children invited. However, if your heart is set on some exceptions then you need to tread around this carefully.

If you would like to extend the invite to the children in your close family, clearly name invitees on their invitations. Make sure invitations sent to other guests are clearly marked with childfree wedding.

To allow for a flower girl and page boy, you can always invite just those two children to the ceremony. This is easier to explain when declining the invitation to other children. Our advice is to organise some childcare for them from the first half of the reception onwards.


The Pros of an Adults Only Wedding

adults only wedding

1 – Budget Savings

While children’s meals are usually cheaper, and they won’t be drinking the wine, the costs per child still add up if you choose to invite them to your wedding. You also need to plan entertainment for them, and maybe even childcare at the venue. All of these extra costs make inviting children to your wedding fairly pricy.

2 – Predictability

We have all attended weddings before where a screaming baby has interrupted the vows. Of course, this is often laughed away, but if you want your day to go off without a hitch then an adults only wedding will ensure a lack of interruptions.

3 – Grown Up Enjoyment

Ensure a relaxed day with unlimited opportunities to drink, dance, and be merry without any looming responsibilities. It will be nice for your friends with kids to leave their children in the safe hands of a babysitter and let their hair down for the day!

4 – Serve More Adventurous Food & Drink

Have the freedom to serve posh canapes and pre-pored cocktails or wine without the risk of little hands falling on them. Things like grazing and charcuterie tables are a bit more palatable when only grown ups are handling the serving tongs.

5 – Have the Wedding of Your Dreams

If you have always dreamed of a destination wedding, your friends with kids probably won’t want to stump up the costs to fly their whole family out with them. Make the choice easier for them by specifying the wedding is adults only and notify them well in advance. This way flights and childcare can be arranged, and the party can begin!


The Cons of an Adults Only Wedding

adults only wedding

1 – It May Reduce Your Guestlist

For many people the costs of travelling to your wedding, buying a gift and paying for childcare are simply unattainable. Others might be breastfeeding, or simply unwilling to spend time apart from their little ones. You will need to be prepared for some of your friends with children to decline your invitation.

2 – Some People May Take Offense

While we think that your wedding means your choice, it seems that childfree weddings can be a contentious issue. This may be particularly relevant if you have a lot of children in your immediate family or close friends group. Our advice is to chat to your nearest and dearest before you even send out the invitations and gauge their opinions that way.

3 – You May Miss the Presence of Children

Of course you might not be keen to have 50 of your co-workers’ children running around your reception, but can you sacrifice your nieces and nephews and flower girls and ring bearers? Children can bring a lovely atmosphere to a wedding, so think carefully about whether or not they will be missed.


Ultimately, your wedding is all yours and it is up to you who is invited. Think carefully about what sort of event you want to have, and bear that in mind when making these decisions. Budget will have a big hand in this – if you have the means, then why not organise an in-wedding creche for your friends and families’ children? This way you can get the best of both worlds.