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"I Don't Like My Engagement Ring": What To Do Next

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"I don't like my engagement ring" - six words you never want to have to say. But the reality is that often, despite the best efforts of our partners, they can make the wrong choice. While you can absolutely grow to love a ring, it is you who has to wear it for the rest of your life. So, it is not unreasonable to want to change it to something more your style. This can be a tricky minefield to navigate, so here's our two cents on what to do next.

 

"I Don't Like my Engagement Ring"... because It's Not My Style

I don't like my engagement ring
Pear shaped solitaire on a tapered shank

This is probably the most difficult reason to get over. If you have always wanted a pear shaped solitaire and you are presented with a cushion cluster, you probably aren't going to change your mind.

In theory this should be a fairly simple issue to fix. Most jewellers will accept exchanges or returns within the first 30 days of the sale. Make a date to go to the jewellers together and choose your new ring. Ensure you are made aware of the budget before you go! This way your partner won't feel pressured in the store to overspend. Going together to choose a ring can be really romantic, and will guarantee that you leave with the ring of your dreams.

I don't like my engagement ring
Rose gold cushion cut engagement ring with pave diamonds

If your ring is bespoke, it is probably not returnable. In this situation you will have to discuss options with the jeweller who made it. The jeweller will be able to tell you which pieces of your ring are useable. They will also give you a quote for remaking it. You might be able to use the existing metal as scrap value against the cost of the remade ring.

The fix may be even easier if your only issue is the chosen metal. For example, if you have been given a ring in platinum but your heart was set on yellow gold. The jeweller should be able to set the stone in a new shank in your desired metal. They may accept your old shank as part payment.

If you feel the ring your partner gave you is too plain, do not rush to replace it. You can always jazz it up with an intricate wedding band or with extra stacking rings. Remember, your chic solitaire will always remain on trend.

 

"I Don't Like my Engagement Ring"... because It's Too Flashy

I don't like my engagement ring
Emerald cut engagement ring with diamond set shoulders

If you are a minimalist person and your partner has presented you with a giant sparkling rock you may feel uncomfortable wearing it on a daily basis. Our advice is to give it a try for a few days and see if you get used to it. If after then you still dislike it, perhaps suggest to your partner that you would be more comfortable with something modest for day to day. You can mention security reasons for this, as well as suggesting that it doesn't compliment your day to day outfits.

Depending on budget they may prefer to get you a second ring for daily wear. Then you can keep the big ring for special occasions and as an heirloom. Otherwise, you should be able to trade the ring in with the original jeweller for something more your style.

I don't like my engagement ring
Dainty brilliant cut solitaire engagement ring

If you feel like your partner has overspent on your ring, this is a more delicate situation. There could be a lot of reasons why your ring had a high budget; they could have had a dedicated savings account; their parents could have gifted money for the ring; or it could be an heirloom. It is important that you ask about this tactfully. Try not to accuse your partner of overspending until you get the full information. Once you have their perspective you can decide whether or not the expense is worth it!

Bear in mind, returning a ring for full retail value may not be possible at a lot of jewellers. You may end up losing more money by trying to get a refund.

 

"I Don't Like my Engagement Ring"... because It's Too Small

I don't like my engagement ring
Princess cut engagement ring with decorative diamond set shoulders

If you hate your engagement ring because the diamond isn't big enough, then you may have to re-evaluate. Honestly, your partner almost certainly went out and bought you the best possible ring they could for the budget that they have. Putting pressure on them to spend even more is unfair and sets a bad precedent for your marriage. Remember, your engagement ring is a symbol of their love and commitment to you. It is also probably one of the biggest purchases they have ever made!